Get informed : Love
forum about love
Ask your question about romantic relationships to others or share your experience by answering to their questions in the forum about love.
questions about love
Unfaithfulness
What does cheating mean to you?
Unfaithfulness can happen for all sorts of reasons. But first off, what does cheating mean to you?
- Kissing someone else?
- Sleeping with someone else?
- Thinking about someone else?
- Being attracted or in love with someone else?
- Going out with, seeing, or flirting with someone else?
You've cheated on your partner
"MY HEART IS TAKEN!"
Above and beyond guilt, try to understand what happened! Here are a few things to think about if you’ve cheated on your partner:
The heart has its reasons. Why did you cheat?
The grass is always greener… Are you dissatisfied in your current relationship?
Fatal attraction. Do your feelings and desire for your new partner seem stronger than those for your current partner?
"SHOULD I TELL OR KEEP IT TO MYSELF?"
A few things to think about to help you decide if it's a good idea to talk about it:
Look inside. According to your values, is it acceptable to not talk about your unfaithfulness? Do you think this is a form of lying?
Weigh both sides. When you think about it, are there more advantages to telling or to not telling? What are the disadvantages of these two options?
Mirror, mirror. If your partner cheated on you, would you want to know?
Finding the right way. If you tell, how will you do it? When? How?
Relieved? If you tell to make yourself feel better, will this be good for the other person? For the relationship?
Your partner has cheated on you...
DISCOVERING THE TRUTH
A few things to think about if you’ve been cheated on:
A clean slate. Are you prepared to live with this, accept it, forgive it?
A melodrama or just a minor anecdote? Is this a reason to end the relationship? Or is it something you need to talk about more?
A nagging doubt… Has this shaken your confidence in your partner?
"Should I stay or should I go?" Can you weigh the advantages and disadvantages of staying in the relationship?
He said, she said. Are you interested in hearing your partner's version? Or talking about what you feel?
IN THE END, YOU CAN:
Turn the page. Accept what happened and move on.
Get things straight. Re-evaluate certain aspects of the relationship in the light of what happened. Define with your partner what is and is not acceptable.
End the relationship. Breaking up with someone doesn’t mean you don’t love them anymore or that you suddenly don’t care about them. Break-ups can be difficult even for the person who’s made the decision. So it’s okay to ask for help if you need it (read more here about break ups).