Get informed : Violence
questions about violence
Violence, family, and love
You're experiencing family violence or violence in your romantic relationship
It’s not your fault. If you’re experiencing violence in your family or your romantic relationship, remember that you’re shouldn’t feel guilty about the violent behaviour you’re experiencing, and you’re not responsible for it. Maybe you’ve been insulted, belittled, or made to feel guilty. Maybe you think that if you had behaved differently, you could have avoided the other person’s violence and hurtful comments. But violence of any form is never justified or acceptable. You never deserve it.
The code of silence. Maybe you’re hesitating to seek help because you’re afraid of the consequences, or because you love your parent or your lover and they’re not always violent. It isn’t easy to break the silence, but doing so may lead to an end to the violent behaviours and may mean that everyone involved receives help and stops living in fear. Talk to an adult you trust — for example, a member of your family, or a school, CLSC, or Tel-jeunes counsellor — about what you’re going through.
A game plan. You can’t see every crisis coming, but you can plan for emergencies. Violence is often a vicious circle (read more here about the cycle of violence). During a crisis, fear may prevent you from thinking clearly and knowing how to react. Can you try to establish a plan that you can follow to ensure your safety in dangerous situations? Where could you go? Who could take you in? Do you know the telephone numbers of people or resources that you can contact if an emergency intervention becomes necessary?
Shelter. When a crisis occurs, it’s not the time to play hero, argue, or try to make your point. Your safety is what’s important. Where can you go to be safe? Who can you go to? What authorities can come help you if things get out of control? You may be worried about the consequences of phoning the police, but if the situation gets out of control or if you afraid, you have to think first and foremost about protecting yourself.
No relief. If the situation persists, you can report the situation confidentially to youth protection agents.
The code of silence. Maybe you’re hesitating to seek help because you’re afraid of the consequences, or because you love your parent or your lover and they’re not always violent. It isn’t easy to break the silence, but doing so may lead to an end to the violent behaviours and may mean that everyone involved receives help and stops living in fear. Talk to an adult you trust — for example, a member of your family, or a school, CLSC, or Tel-jeunes counsellor — about what you’re going through.
A game plan. You can’t see every crisis coming, but you can plan for emergencies. Violence is often a vicious circle (read more here about the cycle of violence). During a crisis, fear may prevent you from thinking clearly and knowing how to react. Can you try to establish a plan that you can follow to ensure your safety in dangerous situations? Where could you go? Who could take you in? Do you know the telephone numbers of people or resources that you can contact if an emergency intervention becomes necessary?
Shelter. When a crisis occurs, it’s not the time to play hero, argue, or try to make your point. Your safety is what’s important. Where can you go to be safe? Who can you go to? What authorities can come help you if things get out of control? You may be worried about the consequences of phoning the police, but if the situation gets out of control or if you afraid, you have to think first and foremost about protecting yourself.
No relief. If the situation persists, you can report the situation confidentially to youth protection agents.