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[ Domestic fights ]

ummm ? - girl - 12 ans (8 April 2014)

My parents are seperated. My dad recently got a girlfriend, but they have been fighting a lot and on several occasions my dad has gone as far as saying that we are moving out of the house we share. The girlfriend has a daughter and we are close but lead pretty different lives so sometimes we just dont click. Anyway, there has been a few big fights and i get really scared during them. i dont have a specific question to ask, i just wanted to talk about it and if possible get some sort of reassuring feedback?

Tel-jeunes’ answer

Hi you! I know fights can be scary; you did a good thing writing to us.

You know, adults sometimes forget that their children are not used to these fights and that they can get really scared! And many times, they can say really bad things to each other without measuring the impact of their words on other people, you understand? That is why it is important to tell them what you feel when they fight. What do you feel? What are you afraid of? Could you tell them? You certainly can’t make them stop fighting, because it is their relationships and it is their problems, but you have the right to ask them not to fight in front of you, do you agree with me? Would you like to ask them? Also, some fights can get out of proportion and if you ever feel that you or someone else is in danger, don’t hesitate to call 911 and get help, ok?

Either way, having someone to talk about all this can help you having a better understanding of the situation and can help you see it from a different perspective. Do you have someone that you trust with whom you could talk about it? Some people like to talk to the social worker of their school, other choose to talk to an adult like their other parent or another person close to them. Don’t forget that you can also call us whenever you want, we are here for you!

Take care and have a nice day!


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