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[ I really need help :/ ]

Need.s.o.s - girl - 15 ans (5 March 2011)

Hi.. I fell in love with my virtual boyfriend. We share each other our life,secret, photo etc in real life i talk to him by fb he say he love me irl and always talk about me to his friend and i believe it becuz his real live bff told me too. But days pass by i found out he going out with other girl same time with me he explain to me that he love me more etc.. Last week i stopped to play on that game and he chat with me on fb say that he miss me and all. One day his other gf told me that he got cancer and probably going to die. But If he does love me why dont he tell me about his cancer? And today i go on my game and make him hate me and act like b**** he seems really sad and i succesfully make him deleted me but my heart felt like dumb and like a knife hurting my heart ik i am weird fallin in love with virtual boy! And i am really sad becuz he got cancer but i still broke his heart many times! Plz help me... Thx

Tel-jeunes’ answer

Hello Need.s.o.s! I understand that this situation isn't easy for you, and that, for a lot of reasons.

I would like to be able to help you, but you don't ask any question in your mail so it's hard for me to identify the kind of support you are looking for. How can we help you? What would you like to do regarding this situation?

You know, love on the Internet is possible. Even though it can be fantastic for some people, the facts are that it can bring a lot of issues in the relationship and we have to be aware of that when we decide to get engage with someone on the Internet. What are those issues for you? For example, how do you feel about the fact that you can't have direct contacts with your boyfriend? How did you react when you learned that he had more than one girlfriend? Are you sure that he is telling the truth about is cancer? At the end, are you ready to accept the insecurity that those realities or possibilities can bring?

You know, the values that we have in real life regarding a relation may not be the same on the net. The bond can be different for some people compare to a relation in reality. You understand? It's important to go get the vision of the other to be sure that we are on the same page. On another side, the fact that it's a virtual relationship doesn't mean that we have to put aside our values, our needs or our limits. I understand that you feel sad and guilty about what happened with that boy, but you had your reasons right? What could make you feel better about this situation? Do you want to try to talk to him to explain your reaction and to also have some explanations about his behaviours? If it's not possible, are you ready to try to get over that relationship? I'll let you think about all that and I hope that these few lines will help you to move on.

You should go read the section LOVE of our website. Some information could help you in your reflections. If you need to talk to someone about how you feel, don't hesitate to call us at 1-800-263-2266. We are there for you.

Good luck!


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