Young people’s questions

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[ am i right ]

lollypop - girl - 14 ans (16 January 2010)

ok hi i don't know if what i did is right for every one but see i love a boy from last year before we are a lover but now not anymore see this year i ask him out but he refuse he said that he want to go back with his ex i don't know who is it because he have so many ex and almost all my friend love him i don't know what to do so i deside to find a boyfriend so i can forget him the probleme is every one said that he love my but i want to help my friends i will be crazy now who sould i help now 7 girls love him include me if i help one of the 7 girls they will be like said i am not a good friend if i help my self they will said you are meen what can i do now is that right what i am doing now searching another boyfriend to forget him please help me

Tel-jeunes’ answer

Hello lollypop,

I read your message with care; love can sometimes seem complicated!

First, I would like to mention that feelings aren't something we can't control. You and your seven friends are attracted to the same guy. You know, you don't have to take position or to choose between you and them. It's not a question of being right for everyone. You all have the right to have feelings. Do you understand what I mean?

We also have to remember that this guy is the only one who can tell if he has feelings for someone or not. Love isn't something we can control, in the sense that feelings aren't always reciprocal. Maybe something with this boy is possible and maybe not. Do you agree with me?

I can feel in your message that you are looking for the "right" thing to do. There is no right or wrong thing to do in that kind of situation. You can choose, for yourself, what is the best solution. For example, some people could choose to talk to the guy in question and verify his own feelings. Some others could choose to move on to something else and others could choose to let some time go by. And you lollipop, what do you want to do? And if you really don't know, maybe it could mean that you still need some time to figure it out?

I let you think about it. We are always available for you!


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