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[ Ejaculation && Sex ]

Girl - girl - 15 ans (22 May 2009)

Hi. So my boyfriend and i have been having sex for about 4 months now but i just recently found out that he has never really ejaculated with a condom. He has once but that is it. When we don't use a condom and he pulls out then he does ejaculate. So i was wondering why he isn't able to ejaculate, if it's my fault and if there is anything i can do to help him or something. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and reply!! ;)

Tel-jeunes’ answer

Hello girl,

Thanks for sharing your preoccupations with us; I understand the situation is important to you.

You know girl, sexuality is a world of discovery. There are so many things to explore and learn about; the use of contraception is part of it. Do you understand what I mean by that? Whether we are a girl or a boy we discover with time to be familiar with our contraceptive methods.

You know, some guys don't see feel any differences with a condom and others do. I want to assure you that it's not a question of you doing something wrong. A guy can need some time to adjust to the use of a condom. The situation you are describing with your boyfriend is normal in the sense that it happens with many guys.

Many things can influence our thougts when we use a condom. At first when we are not use to it all our concentration might go on " putting " the condom. As we become more familiar with it the focus is less on the condom and more on the pleasure of the moment.

In order to make it pleasant we can incorporate it into the relation, as a game. The partners can decide how they want to use it. Putting a condom doesn't have to be "chore". Do you agree with me?

Now, there are many types de condoms from different companies on the market (thin, extra thin, lubrificated, to only name a very few). Each guy can try different types of condom to see which one is the most comfortable. We can also put lubricant inside the tip of the condom.

I always find important to have a reminder about vaginal lubrification. It's an essential ingredient for a sexual relation because it facilitates the penis movements without causing any irritaton. It is difficult to have a sexual relation if we aren't sexually excited. It may cause some irritation. Do you agree with me?

I read in your message that he sometimes doesn't use a condom and " pulls out". You know, this pratice is at risk of pregnancy. The pre ejaculatory liquid does also contains spermatoïds. Did you know about that? Are you aware that it's not a " safe " pratice?

There are a lot of info in my reply... I'll let you first take some time to think about it all. You can also talk with your boyfriend about it. Communication is such an important tool in a relationship. You can always contact us back if you need to!


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